Transition: At What Stage Are You?

We all go through it at one time or another in our life. For some of us, more times than we may realize. I’ve been going through a major one now for the past three years; and one before that; and one before that, and, well, you get the idea.

I recently attended a webinar hosted by my friend Peleg Top dealing with transition and creativity. Borrowing some from what Peleg presented, “Transitions can be subtle or can shake us to our core. Unless we have the tools to navigate through these challenging periods, we may find ourselves stuck and unable to move forward.

“For most of us, facing change and transition comes with much fear and anxiety. We tend to overthink the process, worrying about the unknown future and in that space we tend to forget that change has great potential for growth, innovation, and renewal. It involves developing a mindset that values flexibility, open-mindedness, and a willingness to step out of comfort zones.”

In his TED talk The Secret to Mastering Life’s Biggest Transitions, Bruce Feiler identifies three stages that represent the emotional and psychological journey we go through when we face significant changes.

This framework can apply to different types of transitions, like career changes, relationship changes, relocating to a new place, or even coping with loss.

The first stage is the long goodbye

This stage has a mix of emotions, including denial, sadness, anger, and confusion. This is a time of reflection on your experiences, your identity, the roles you played, and the expectations that will no longer be part of your life.

The key to navigating this stage is acceptance and allowing oneself to grieve for what is being lost, recognizing it as a necessary step for moving forward.

The second stage is the messy middle

This is the phase where the old has been left behind, but the new has not yet fully taken shape. This is the stage where we often encounter confusion, doubt, and questioning.

You may struggle with your sense of self, not knowing exactly who you are in the absence of the roles and identities you’ve left behind. This is a time of experimentation, making mistakes, learning, and gradually gaining clarity.

The messy middle requires patience, resilience, and the willingness to embrace the unknown as an crucial part of the transition process.

The third stage is called The New Beginning

This stage has a renewed sense of purpose, clarity, and optimism. You start to establish new routines, form new relationships, and fully engage with your new reality.

This stage is a time of growth, accomplishment, and excitement for the future. This stage  requires an open heart and mind, as well as the courage to step into the unknown with confidence.

I think I must still have one foot in the Messy Middle and the other foot in the New Beginning. However, it’s not uncommon for us to feel a presence in all three.

Next up in the webinar was a discussion of values and its two types, namely Life and Operational. Life values are those we have for the long term, what we want out of life. Operational values are those we have to attain our long term values. These traits help us get through the transitions we encounter. My three main ones are adaptability, curiosity and creativity.

From a list of about thirty or more Operational values, we were asked to pick six that resonate with us. My six: Flexibility, Competency, Honesty, Humor, Creativity and Discipline. I then narrowed these down to three that meant the most to me, namely Honesty, Humor and Creativity. Out of these, I chose Creativity, which really resonates with me.

My six Life values are: Happiness, Health, Family, Wealth, Wisdom and Fellowship. The three meaning the most to me are Happiness, Health and Fellowship, with Happiness being the one truly resonating with me.

Creativity is very important to me because it resonates with my internal being. It can lead to better times. Happiness can happen by way of creativity and flexibility. I need to further explore how best I can attain true happiness.

Borrowing again from Peleg’s webinar about creativity’s role in transition, Creativity can support us in every stage of change, offering comfort in the Long Goodbye, guidance in the Messy Middle, and celebration in the New Beginning.

Creativity has the potential  to become your true guide, Peleg says, lighting the way forward as you step into the unknown, ready for change, growing stronger and more adaptable with every transition.

So no matter what stage of change you are meeting yourself in these days, Peleg suggests your creativity is a powerful ally in this journey. Your creativity can build bridges over obstacles, turning challenges into opportunities for growth and innovation.

He concludes by saying that as you embrace your creativity as your guide, you will discover that within you lies the power to face any change, to navigate through any transition, and to emerge on the other side ready to paint the canvas of your life with the vibrant colors of your newfound insights.

Without creativity my life would be truly without merit. When I tap into my creativity, it’s like I’m tapping into my seventh sense, a new form of being. It helps me on my life’s journey to become more than I can on my own. It’s a living, breathing, vital part of my soul. It’s up to me to keep it alive.

How is creativity playing a part in your life? Have you embraced it as a vital partner?

 

Hopefully making a ruckus, one blog post at a time!

Be sure to check out my other blog, Ideasnmoreblog, for a different kind of playground for creativity, innovation and inspiring stuff.

And, check out various creative selections from ideasnmore.net.

Jolan tru!

A Mantra to Live By

Every so often I read something that really gets my attention and makes me think. This recently happened during a webinar wherein my take-away could be a life changer. Thus far it has proved its worth.

It’s a mantra of sorts and one that can add to your core beliefs if you say it often enough. I offer it up to you in the hopes that it will help in your daily life. Memorize it. Make copies and spread it around where you go, where you’ll see it. Say it to yourself everyday and believe it.

“Things are always working out for me.”  🙂

 

Hopefully making a ruckus, one blog post at a time!

Be sure to check out my other blog, Ideasnmoreblog, for a different kind of playground for creativity, innovation and inspiring stuff.

And, check out various creative selections from ideasnmore.net.

Jolan tru!

Enhancing My Creativity And Reducing Financial Anxiety

In my travels last week I journeyed to Buffalo, New York for a two day workshop on creativity and followed that up with a seminar in Santa Fe, New Mexico. No, I didn’t rack up frequent flyer miles as these treks were done virtually.

The webinar in Buffalo was at Buffalo State University, State University of New York (SUNY). It was the annual Creativity Expert Exchange and attended by creators from around the country and the globe. It was put on by the Center for Applied Imagination.

Some of the topics included Creative Thinking in Organizations, Changing your Mindset with Creativity, Developing Curiosity and Imagination Skills, Creative Thinking Skills to Help Increase Motivation, and Intuition and Creativity. Who knows, I may yet opt for a Master of Science from the university.

My journey then took me to Santa Fe, New Mexico for a Saturday webinar presented by Peleg Top on the topic of “Overcoming Money Anxiety in Uncertain Times”. I’ve attended several webinars hosted by Peleg and this one was as formidable as the previous ones.

About the workshop, Peleg states . . .

“Money anxiety is a profound emotional response that can affect every aspect of our lives. As creatives, we are uniquely positioned to tackle this anxiety not through conventional means, but by tapping into our inherent creative strengths and emotional intelligence.

But have you ever paused to ask yourself “where these feelings come from?

The first step in overcoming money anxiety is recognizing its source. For many of us creatives, financial insecurity is deeply tied to our sense of self-worth and identity. If deep down inside we don’t actually believe we are worthy of financial wealth, and we continuously compare ourselves to others, the feeling of inadequacy and imposter syndrome will trigger our anxiety when it comes to money.

The next crucial step is to shift your mindset and way of being from scarcity to abundance. And the best place to start this journey is reconnecting with your “Soul Artist” – your authentic creative self.

Your Soul Artist is the inner voice that fuels your creativity and imagination. In times of financial stress, it’s easy to let fear and self-doubt silence this voice. Reawakening your Soul Artist involves nurturing your creativity, allowing it to guide you through the emotional turmoil of money anxiety.

Creativity is not just a tool for producing art. Creativity is a mechanism for problem-solving and emotional resilience. When faced with financial uncertainty, leveraging your creativity can transform anxiety into action.

When your Soul Artist is alive and well, it will act as a shield against anxiety and worries because it will be the louder voice you hear, motivating you, inspiring you and moving you into activating your creativity to face any financial hurdle.

This might mean exploring new avenues for your work, adapting your skills to new markets, or even using your creative talents to support your community. These actions not only help mitigate financial stress but also reinforce your identity as a creative professional.”

In one of two exercises we did, Peleg asked us to complete the sentence, “When it comes to money, I’m afraid that . . .” We were given about eight minutes to complete as many of these thoughts as time allowed.

The second part of this first exercise had us select one of the previously written statements and explore possible solutions and to be specific. For example, I wrote “When it comes to money, I’m afraid that I’ll never realize a life of abundance.” One of my solutions was “there are other things in life beside money; what can I do to enjoy life more; I have my stories to finish and to develop more and turn them into a book.”

The second exercise had us draw a picture on a page in our journal/journey book in and around the mantra statement “Things are always working out for me.” In my case, I added the sentiment “Believe it and believe in myself. OK?” Tear it from your book and take it with you wherever you go; make as many copies as you want.

Where will my journey take me this week? I have no idea. Maybe, just maybe, I’ll have along with me some additional tools to aid me in my travels. Regardless, that’s the way I need to think so I can act accordingly.

Hopefully making a ruckus, one blog post at a time!

Be sure to check out my other blog, Ideasnmoreblog, for a different kind of playground for creativity, innovation and inspiring stuff.

And, check out various creative selections from ideasnmore.net.

Jolan tru!

How Creatives Can Stay Positive During Darker Times

The following article, by contributor Tom May, is from the publication Creative Boom, registered in England and Wales. Launched in 2009, it explores the best in creativity and delivers news, inspiration, insight and advice to help creatives succeed.

It was introduced to me at a very opportune time in that I’m feeling more and more frustrated at the lack of work and delinquent accounts receivable. Several points in the article make me think I need to either do them and/or do more of them. Becoming a hermit is not the answer, even when you feel like doing nothing. I know from experience.

Because this is a longer-than-usual blog post, grab your favorite cocktail or a cup of coffee and enjoy the read.

So, on with the article . . .

Are you finding your life and work particularly challenging right now? You’re by no means alone. After all, we might be past the worst of Covid now, but the world hasn’t exactly pivoted into the big, happy, post-pandemic party we’d all hoped for.

Instead, we’re suffering from economic turmoil, political tensions, and a general atmosphere of uncertainty. And when that coincides with personal struggles in getting enough work to survive, it can lead to some pretty dark thoughts.

Yet, while these struggles are real, that doesn’t mean they can’t be overcome. And those who manage to do so will only grow and become stronger as a result.
Part of that is simply what photographer Mike Black describes as: “Bloody-mindedness and a desire to keep going.” As he puts it: “If you carry on creating, the work will eventually acquire some value when you look back on it. As someone once said to me, ‘How many recessions have you been through now, Mike?'”

But how do you keep going when everything seems so dire? We asked the Creative Boom community to provide actionable advice and insights on staying positive and productive. And as always, they provided some great advice. We share some of their best ideas below.

1. First, accept your situation
As with many problems in life, the first step towards resilience is acceptance. You need to accept this is how things are, however much you’d like them to be different.

There’s no point, for example, in obsessing over how you once had multiple clients falling over themselves to give you commissions, and now there’s silence. That’s just the nature of freelance work; it tends to be cyclical. “It happens, and it will happen again,” says senior freelance copywriter Jonathan Wilcock. “There will be lows as well as highs. So when the good times come, make the most of it and save the pennies. Conversely, when the doldrums hit, remember it will definitely change.”

Most importantly, accepting that the market for your services has dipped in general prevents you from blaming yourself personally. “It’s not you!” says brand builder Asa, aka Work by Page. “Everyone’s feeling the squeeze in this climate, so keep celebrating the small wins – even surviving this current market is a huge success. And if you’re new to this, that’s one hell of a baptism of fire. Hopefully, one day, it’ll feel much smoother.”

2. Stay informed, but not overwhelmed
One reason you may be blaming yourself is that you’re seeing so many success stories on social media, and that can skew your perspective. So, it’s vital to remember that this is not a representative sample of how creatives are doing in general. After all, few people post on Instagram when they get turned down for a project or if it goes badly.

As Chris Duffy, co-chief and creative director at Fire Dept, puts it: “Comparison is the thief of joy. So, forget what everyone else is doing. Concentrate on what you can do, and get it in front of as many people as possible.”

When you’re on a downer, looking for inspiration from your social feeds is, of course, natural. But, believes Steve Price, chief brand officer for Lkysunz, that’s playing a dangerous game. “Sitting scrolling through social media, witnessing the myriad of posts from recruiters and observing the pile-on in the comments will crush your spirit,” he says. “So instead, update that book you’ve been putting off. Work on side projects you’ve left collecting dust. Focus on keeping yourself busy and doing work that makes your soul flutter.”

Indie director and screenwriter Miles Watts agrees. “Spend less time online reading about what everyone else is doing,” he urges. “Focus on real-world one-on-one relationships to edge things forward each day and help you stay sane!”

Social media is especially problematic if you work alone because all the nuance can get lost, and you can start to get a warped picture of how things really are. Designer and illustrator Kevin Tiernan is aware of this dynamic and actively works against it. “I try not to misconstrue my thoughts as solid facts,” he explains. “Do I have the evidence to back up any negative thoughts? Am I futurecasting? Sometimes, when you talk to somebody else, you can hear that your inner narrative doesn’t hold water.”

Dealing with One’s Inner Critic

Ever wish you could always do what your mind tells you even if it means doing something you’re not sure about? Maybe you’re afraid of what the outcome will be. Whether you believe it or not, you have someone working against you. That someone is your inner critic. How you deal with him or her defines how you respond to fear.

I recently took part in a webinar that dealt specifically with the inner critic. We completed two exercises and my results are shared below, offered in the spirit of full transparency.

Exercise #1

#1 List six things I’d like to do
Finish my story
Decide on insurance premium help
Relax more
Take time each day to write
Not worry about finances
Become more settled with what I can control

#2 List why you feel you can’t do this for each of the six things you just wrote down
I always seem to worry about something else on my “to do” list
I can’t truly clear my mind of conflict
I always seem to have something else to do (my mind working overtime)
Sounds simple enough to do but I need to focus better
Guess I’m scared as to facing the worst case scenario
Because I’m still thinking about what I can’t control

Exercise #2

Complete the following sentence:
I would love to (blank) but I’m afraid that (blank).

It’s important that each time you write down something to fill each blank that you rewrite the entire sentence. This helps your mind truly capture what you’re thinking.

I would love to write every day but I’m afraid I will miss out on some other priority.
I would love to relax more but I’m afraid that if I do, I’ll let something slip by me or forget something.
I would love to be more comfortable with not being in control all the time but I’m afraid I’ll confuse myself or my priorities.
I would love to not worry so much but I’m afraid to really let go.
I would love to be more structured in life but I’m afraid I’ll forget to do something.

Now, for each of the above statements, rewrite them so that the outcomes are more positive than negative.

For example . . .I would love to write everyday so I can build momentum and get on with other unfinished story ideas and, thereby, regain sense of accomplishment.

Some miscellaneous thoughts:
Activate your imagination to explore possibilities.
Look at where your story of fear really lives — and refrain it into a positive
Make peace with the unknown — what does this look like?
You are inherently good — what have you not heard enough of?

 

Hopefully making a ruckus, one blog post at a time!

Be sure to check out my other blog, Ideasnmoreblog, for a different kind of playground for creativity, innovation and inspiring stuff.

And, check out various creative selections from ideasnmore.net.

Jolan tru!

Year of the Dragon and How to Face Yours

Enter the Year of the Dragon and the Chinese New Year. My friend and mentor, Peleg Top, shares what to do and how to face life while we are dealing with our inner dragon. He reflects on the symbolism and teachings that this mythic creature brings into our lives.

The dragon represents many things, among them being resilient, a quality we need to get through life’s challenges and pitfalls. Let me put forth some of Peleg’s thoughts on how to tame one’s inner dragon so that we all may face what life throws at us and be better for it.

Dragons, in various cultures, symbolize power, strength, and wisdom. Yet, they also embody the internal battles we all face.The dragons within us breathe the fires of doubt, fear, and criticism, often obscuring the path to our authentic selves. Yet, these dragons are not to be vanquished but understood and loved. They hold the keys to our liberation, offering lessons in resilience, courage, and the power of embracing our vulnerabilities. Just as the dragon is a respected symbol in Chinese culture, so too can our inner dragon be honored for the protective role it plays in our inner world. It shows up in one of these four forms: 1. Paralysis by Analysis: When facing a significant decision, our inner dragon might manifest as doubt leading to over-analyze every possible outcome. This critical voice can lead to indecision, convincing us that no choice is safe enough or perfect enough, ultimately stalling our progress. 2. Fear of Failure: Our dragon is only thinking of the outcome and whispers warnings of embarrassment, loss, and the judgment of others which can block our creative free spirit and deter us from taking any risks or making bold decisions that could lead to growth and success. 3. Impostor Syndrome: This self-doubting voice questions your qualifications and abilities, making you wonder if you’re truly deserving of the opportunities ahead, potentially leading you to pass up on valuable chances. 4. Resistance to Change: This inner dragon preys on the comfort of the familiar, instilling fear of the unknown and convincing you to stick with the status quo, even when change is necessary for personal growth and well being. Can you relate to any of these? We do our best to silence our dragon with unhealthy habits so that we can cope with life. But no amount of alcohol or drugs or any other addiction will ever tame this beast. It will only feed it and make it stronger and louder. We must face this dragon head on with love and compassion so that it becomes our ally rather than our tyrant. Here’s what we do: We invite the dragon to the table. We listen to its fears with a heart wide open, learning to discern the protective intentions behind their fierce and ugly voice. We learn how to love this part of us whose sole role is to protect us from harm. At the same time, we begin a radical self-love practice. Radical self-love goes beyond the conventional self-care. It involves recognizing and embracing every aspect of our being — including flaws, mistakes, and vulnerabilities — with compassion, understanding, and unconditional love. A radical self-love practice will challenge societal norms, expectations, and the sabotaging inner dragon that perpetuates feelings of inadequacy, self-doubt, and unworthiness. This is when the magic happens. This is when we meet our inner angels—the best versions of ourselves—beings of light, wisdom, and potential that we can only fully embrace once we’ve made peace with our inner dragons. They are the voices of encouragement, inspiration, and love that flourish when the critic is no longer ruling our inner world with fear. As we tame our dragons, we unlock the gates to a richer, more vibrant life, where our angels guide us toward our true potential. This Year of the Dragon calls us to embark on a journey of profound change, guided by the principles of love, abundance, and creative free spirit. Let’s embrace our inner dragons, not as tyrants to be feared, but as teachers, protectors, and partners in our quest for growth and self-realization. What I (Peleg) know for sure is that when we dance with our dragons, we unlock the full spectrum of our creative power, ready to paint the world with the colors of our wildest dreams. After all, it is through taming our dragons that we learn to fly. My life (Joe’s) is topsy-turvy these days so any help I can get to render my inner dragon less formidable I welcome. I trust these suggestions and thoughts that Peleg puts forth will also aid you in confronting and dealing with your dragons.   Hopefully making a ruckus, one blog post at a time! Be sure to check out my other blog, Ideasnmoreblog, for a different kind of playground for creativity, innovation and inspiring stuff. And, check out various creative selections from ideasnmore.net. Jolan tru!

Embracing Darkness-part 2

In the first of two parts of reviewing a webinar on embracing darkness, I completed the sentence – My inner darkness surfaces when. The second of two questions from the webinar involved completing this sentence: In my darkest moments I discovered. . . Below is what I came up with in ten minutes.

In my darkest moments I discovered . . . I could always bring myself back to reality and some form of hopefulness; that I still have things for which I am grateful and thankful. My darkness will not last, that I will experience light again one day. That I never know how long the darkness will last, and to just go with it. Some days are better than others but they’re never consistent. Uncertainty is a certainty. Try to balance as best I can.

In my inwardness as I embrace my darkness I reflect on the mistakes and misfortunes in my life. I also recall some good times. It’s a mixed blessing. I see where I am today and wonder about where I want to be, my expectations. I also wonder whether or not any will be realized. I don’t know. I also realize there’s so much that is out of my control.

I try not to worry about that which is out of my control, for it does me no good. This is easier said than done, however. Exploring one’s inner darkness can be scary but as long as one can take away a positive here and there, it’s worth the exercise.

 

Hopefully making a ruckus, one blog post at a time!

Jolan tru!

Embracing Darkness-part 1

Recently I attended a virtual webinar on embracing darkness, a journey through the soul’s winter. It provided a time to be quiet and for introspection. While the webinar is over, I’m still involved in the introspection phase. I invite you to join me in your own version of introspection time.

During the webinar we were asked to complete two sentences. In this, part one of two parts, first sentence you are to complete it as follows: My inner darkness surfaces when . . . (time yourself for about ten minutes), then review and think about what you just wrote. I’ll provide the second sentence in part two later this week.

In the spirit of full transparency, this is what I wrote: My inner darkness surfaces when I think about either fond memories of Pam or sad ones involving her sickness. Even fond memories of Debbie, then realizing I don’t have either in my life anymore. When I think about family and know they’ve gone away and don’t stay in touch – makes me sad and empty. It surfaces when I feel trapped and hopeless, without a car and fully dependent on others to go anywhere or do anything. I’m glad I have Snoopy and Pam’s urn to talk to; it breaks the silence and solitude. Sometimes when I least expect it memories spur others and are haunting.

Where does that leave me? How do I move forward? I’m not in a downward spiral but there are days when I feel I am slipping. I’ve got to maintain a positive attitude and outlook. I am thankful for small victories and things or events to which I look forward. My introspection evolves everyday.

Question #2 in part two. Stay tuned.

 

Hopefully making a ruckus, one blog post at a time!

Jolan tru!

Season of Inwardness

As it has been a few weeks since I last posted on this blog, I thought it appropriate when I read this passage from my friend Felix Scardino to share with you as we approach Christmas and year’s end.

The message is one by which we should all abide, if we can, and be appreciative of our time with which to do so. I continue to go through a period of isolation and inwardness in my life and reading this passage again helps me try and maintain a sense of normalcy and positiveness. I think it can for you, too.

Love winter when the plant says nothing. —Thomas Merton  

Wise ones have always reminded us to balance our external lives with periods of inward attention. They have encouraged us to seasonally slow down and go inside, where we find strength and nourishment for our active lives. Traditionally this inward movement preceded and prepared for great holidays which marked the time for new beginnings. These holidays celebrate the cycle of the seasons, and it was no accident that Christmas was placed in the “dead” of winter, coinciding with the ancient Feast of Lights.

During winter, nature leads the way inward as foliage fades, loses the green color of life, and eventually falls, leaving the trees to appear lifeless. On the surface the trees seem still and inert. But below the surface a period of very active recharging is occurring as roots go deeper into the soil to gather strength. In time color will return brighter than ever. Because we are part of nature, there is reason to believe that our biological clocks are in sync with this same inward movement; that is also our time to go inward to recharge and renew. The stillness of this season is given for that purpose.

Department stores and sales catalogs don’t want us to believe this. Before our last bite of Thanksgiving turkey, they push us to heed their hype, buy their wares, and party, filling the stillness with distractions and confusion. Inwardness is countered by an escalation of the previous year’s frenzy. When nature calls us inside against all odds, the result is tension, compulsive eating and drinking, and the all too prevalent Christmas depression.

Prior to central heating, department stores, and shopping malls, people literally went inside at this time and gathered around the warmth of fires. It was a time of thanksgiving for the year’s harvest and preparations for the coming year. It was a season of transition, forming a bridge between the old and the new, between what was and what was to come. Pausing on the bridge leads to clear directions for the new year.

There is an inactive, uncertain still point during transition, when the past is gone and future is not yet here. While our culture finds that still point intolerable, it is during that time that we come to know ourselves, our motivations and deeper needs. You can make practical use of that time by balancing your social life with stillness and reflection. Dare to spend some time alone, setting aside a few minutes each day just to listen to yourself. Go inside and ask honest questions about what really matters and what you really want. You will come out sharpened and with a new perspective, ready to make effective choices for the coming year.

Merry Christmas and may you be blessed with insights this season and in 2024.

Thomas Merton OCSO (January 31, 1915 – December 10, 1968) was an American Trappist monk, writer, theologian, mystic, poet, social activist and scholar of comparative religion. On May 26, 1949, he was ordained to the Catholic priesthood and given the name “Father Louis”. He was a member of the Abbey of Our Lady of Gethsemani, near Bardstown, Kentucky, living there from 1941 to his death.

 

Hopefully making a ruckus, one blog post at a time!

Be sure to check out my other blog, Ideasnmoreblog, for a different kind of playground for creativity, innovation and inspiring stuff.

And, check out various creative selections from my website.

Jolan tru!

Creativity and Well-being

Normally a post about an aspect of creativity would be included on my other blog, but since this is a special post about well-being and was the subject of a recent webinar I attended, I thought it would be a good idea to share its content.

The webinar was hosted by the Center for Applied Imagination from the State University of New York-Buffalo State. This session featured Dr. Molly Holinger who discussed the relationship between creativity and well-being. The link to access this recording is https://youtu.be/OVt6iPNqgaA. Hope you enjoy it!

Oh, by the way, Happy Halloween!

Hopefully making a ruckus, one blog post at a time!

Be sure to check out my other blog, Ideasnmoreblog, for a different kind of playground for creativity, innovation and inspiring stuff.

And, check out various creative selections from my website.

Jolan tru!